The Last Christmas

The funny looking man in the blood-red pyjamas stroked his extra-long white beard pensively as he stared at the screen of the red and white gizmo in front of him. Everything here was either white or red–only interspersed here and there with black. He had been alternately looking at various parts of the globe. The result was not encouraging. He was getting tired of it all, even his tummy testified–it was no longer as rotund.

He was discouraged. It was so bad he was not sleeping well–probably why he was putting on weight. He reached for another snack. He simply had seen too many Christmases. There used to be a time when he looked forward to Christmas, when the Christmas spirit still used to hover in the air and possess people. Things were different now; people had grown calloused and no longer cared. As a result, the Christmas spirit was in short supply. And he very well could not keep sending the Spirits of Christmas to teach them, Scrooge was an exception. If only they would turn around like Ebenezer did. They did not seem inclined to; instead they worked harder and harder to diminish Christmas and all it stood for. The latest move was to extricate the Christ from the festivity and leave only the mass…What a mess. Everything was going wrong. Even his transport was having issues. Wunorse Openslae had used paint stripper instead of wax on Rudolph’s red nose. The result was like an amateur paint job on a rusted, seen-better-days fender, it was neither the intended colour nor the original–really funny, except you were Rudolph. And he had so wanted that reindeer to be the first to pull the nuclear sleigh the elves had just built.

Christmas was two days away and there was still a lot to do. He stepped away from the crystal clear North Pole skyline to the fridge to get a milkshake–he’d said say no to it severally, it just didn’t listen. He returned to the toy-littered work area, he had added a jumbo size burger for good measure. He was going to sleep here tonight, again. The missus was definitely not going to be pleased. No biggy, he would give her two fantastic nights at the Poleria–he had a no-limit credit line that was valid at the casino and any of the shops. She would blow money away, and be pacified.

Daylight, travelling at186, 000 m/s, was chasing away the little night remaining when he got through. It made him wonder what the speed of darkness was. He’d have to google that later.

He was set for all the chimneys, fireplaces and windows he’d have to squeeze through. Time to check on Earth, he turned the device on. Military music was being broadcast from all the major news networks, and streamed live online. A brief announcement by a crisp, clipped voice followed: the army had overthrown the One Earth government. Their first official act was to impose worldwide martial law, indefinitely; the second was to suspend Christmas, indefinitely.

©2014 John, Chidi
All Rights Reserved

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